Deadly Farts
by Tangible Orange Potato Muffin
Summary: Dogs can eat burritos. Akamaru eats burritos and gets a frenzy. How do you stop it? I don't know. All Kiba wanted was to live. 'I'm going to die before I get married won't I' Tiny bit of SasuSaku, but mostly some corney humor. Which is why I like it


**Deadly Farts?**

Is it just me or did you see a Bouncing dog in here?

i just hope you enjoy this! my randomness is back!!

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A nice day in Konoha just turned into the disgusting days in the life of our characters. "NARUTO, KIBA!! COME BACK HERE!!" screamed their friends, who were chasing Naruto and Kiba with their hands on there noses. "NEVER!!" said the two crazy high school students with masks on their faces. '_Oh, Akamaru I'm sorry. Baka Naruto._' Kiba had thought while running for his life.

Well that's getting ahead of our story. Let me tell of what just happened. Remember kids don't try this at home, well actually you can I recommend you don't, but who am I to stop you. Anyway, here's the story.

**ONE DAY BEFORE THIS INCIDENT**

Naruto and Kiba were walking down the hallway when they spotted Chouji eating a burrito. "Hey, Kiba have you ever farted after eating a bean and cheese burrito? " Naruto said as he watched Chouji. "Sometimes, but then one time Akamaru took it and then oddly he farts like crazy. I can't even bare it. **WAY** too stinky." Kiba said as he reminisced the time he witness Akamaru's stinky farts. It gave him the chills. '_Now that is scary. I never knew dogs could fart. Hey, that gives me an idea_.' Naruto thought with a smirk on his face. "Oh! Hi Naruto, Kiba. What's up?" said Chouji finishing the last of his burrito. "Nothing really happening for me, Chouji." Said Kiba. "I see, well I have to go now. I have to meet with my dad for some family cooking lessons. Later, Kiba." Chouji said as he walked out of the sight of the two boys.

A few minutes later, Naruto had just finished his little idea. "Kiba, what do you think if we make a burrito that Akamaru can eat then he will fart like crazy in front of our friends?" Naruto said with his eyes big. "WHAT?! NO WAY! Akamaru's farts are _**DEADLY!**_ I'm serious. I've experienced it, his farts made me run out of the family compound and soon after I found myself in the hospital with an oxygen mask on. I don't want that happening to EVERYONE! I'll get in trouble myself and I'll probably end up in the hospital AGAIN!" Kiba shouts at the top of his lungs. "Awww, come on Kiba just once?" Naruto asked with puppy dog eyes since Kiba is just helpless when it came to doggie features. Kiba stood there standing and trying to resist, failing by the way, the doggie cuteness Naruto was getting away with. "Fine, but I'm not going to be the one giving the burrito to Akamaru." Kiba said in defeat of the puppy eyes. "Alright, meet me at my house for the plan Stinky Farts to commence and bring Akamaru." Naruto said running off to get his supplies for OPERATION: STINKY FARTS. Kiba just stood there. '_This is going to be bad. I just know it_.' He thought as he knew he was in for one of the longest day of his life.

**NEXT DAY**

Just as Naruto said Kiba went to go to Naruto's house. Looking down he saw Akamaru in his hands. '_Oh, Akamaru please just don't fart this time. Please don't. Oh please kami-sama don't let him fart._' Kiba arrived at Naruto's house finding a mat laid out on his lawn. "Naruto. I'm here please lets get this over with." Kiba said as he thought that Naruto was going to do something that might actually get him killed.

"Hey Kiba! I have our plan set up all we need to do is gather everyone for our little party of farts!" Naruto said as he grinned evilly. "You mean YOUR plan I'm just here to watch you try to NOT poison Akamaru with your concoction." Kiba said with a disgusted face. "Awww fine then well call everyone to come to the park for this thing at least." Naruto said. "Fine fine just don't do anything that will us kicked out of Konoha." Kiba said as he walked inside and dialed the numbers of Sasuke, Sakura, Hinata, Shino, Ino, and Shikamaru. '_I'm going to be dead before I even get married won't I_?' Kiba thought as he dialed for Sasuke.

**With Naruto**

"Alright! Akamaru are you ready for your little farting experience?" Naruto said to Akamaru who was sitting next to the tree. "ARF!" barked Akamaru as he wagged his tail happily. "Okay, this is going to be great!" Naruto smiled. '_MUWAHAHA! I'm so evil; the Kyuubi's sneaky tricks are finally rubbing off on me! Sasuke, Sakura, and everyone else is in for the SMELLIEST days of their lives! MUWAHAHAHAHA!_' thought Naruto the new not so smart evil genius.

**With Kiba and the Phone**

"Hey Sasuke, its' Kiba." Kiba said. "Yeah I know. What do you want?" Sasuke said having not a bit of interest as to what Kiba had to say. "Can you come to the park at around 10?" Kiba asked nervously knowing he just might get a huge helping of Uchiha power. "Why?" Sasuke said questioning his tone. "Naruto is going to speak to you." Kiba lied. "Then why are you calling for him?" Sasuke asked. '_Man, can't he just give me an answer of yes or no? This is making this so much harder!! Well, this is an Uchiha I'm talking about_.' Kiba thought. "Well, I'm just at his house and he's outside playing with Akamaru and Sakura is going to be there." Kiba blurted out without thinking. Big mistake for Kiba Sasuke blushed as he heard the name of his former teammate with pink hair and the cutest smiles he has ever seen. "Okay. I'll meet you there. Bye Kiba." Sasuke said as he rushed to hang up the phone. '_AWWW MAN! I DID IT! I __**LIED**__ TO __**UCHIHA SASUKE**__; my life is at an end. Why did I just have to go and tell Sasuke that Sakura was going to be there when I didn't ask her yet!? I'm dead. That's for sure. I am __**DEAD**_!' Kiba thought with images of Sasuke beating him up with Sharingan enhanced Chidori. After that little incident, he called everyone else including Sakura and luckily for him she said yes.

Kiba walked outside with relief and soon saw Naruto, Akamaru, and a Supreme Bean and Cheese Filled Burrito with grill marks. "Okay, tell me you're not going to feed that **THING** to Akamaru." Kiba said nervously. '_Where in the world can grill marks come from if there isn't even a grill that big!?'_ thought Kiba staring at the gigantic sized burrito in Naruto's hands. "OF COURSE I AM! What do you think I'm going to do eat this burrito myself?" Naruto asked already knowing the answer. "Yes." Kiba said with sigh. "Well, yeah now. Let's get ready for the park! YAY!" Naruto shouted. "ARF ARF ARF!" Akamaru barked in joy of seeing the burrito. '_Yeah, Yay…I'm ready to say goodbye to this cruel world._' Thought Kiba and his sarcasm.

**At the Park**

Everyone was getting ready for what was going to come. Kiba had told them to bring some snacks for a picnic type of thing, when it was just the disguise for Naruto's OPERATION: STINKY FARTS. Starring yours truly Akamaru, the nin-dog of Inuzuka Kiba of the Great Inuzuka Clan. Everyone had started arriving, the first to arrive as Sakura and Sasuke. "Hi, Sasuke-kun, Kiba-kun, and Naruto! Awww you even brought Akamaru! How cute! Oh, I brought some sandwiches for our picnic I hope you all like them." Sakura said after putting down the sandwiches on their large white blanket. "Hn, I brought rice balls for you all." Sasuke said with a small tinge of blush on his cheeks, but it was hidden under his bangs.

In a few minutes, everyone had arrived. "Hey, Forehead-girl. I brought some dumplings for everyone please enjoy!" Ino said as she took as seat between Sakura and Shikamaru. "How troublesome, more food to eat if only Chouji was here." Shikamaru said as he lay down and sighed heavily. "Hi Naruto-kun, may I sit next to you?" asked Hinata as she looked down and played with her fingers. "Sure, Hinata-chan! Sit, Sit take a seat!" Naruto grinned. '_Oh no, Naruto not Hinata. Oh gosh, Hinata will be hit first. Oh man, this is just great. I'm sorry Hinata-chan..._' Kiba thought as he sat next to Hinata and Shino.

**The Big Operation: STINKY FARTS**

Naruto had stood up to get the burrito behind the tree and feed Akamaru. "I'll be back everyone. Please keep eating!" Naruto smirked as soon as he left his spot and start up OPERATION: STINKY FARTS. "I'll be back in a few minutes as well." Kiba said as he picked up Akamaru and place him near Naruto. Everyone else just kept eating. Sasuke and Sakura were holding hands like little children. how cute Ino was watching Shikamaru sleep while eating some of Sasuke's Rice-balls. As for Shino, well you probably know anyway, was watching his bugs on the grass, as soon as he smelled beans. "Beans." Shino muttered. "Huh? What did you say Shino-kun?" Hinata pondered. 'OH NO! SHINO!! I'M SORRY, BUT YOU MUST NOT INTERFER!!' Kiba thought as he ran to Shino and knocked him out with a hard punch. Hinata just stood there with her eyes and mouth opened wide. "KIBA-KUN! WHAT WAS THAT FOR?" Hinata said as she rushed to aid poor K.O.-ed Shino. well Shino won't be affected at least "Oh, I hit Shino, sorry. I thought he was a bug." Kiba said as always when he ever knocked Shino down. Hinata just sweatdropped as usual.

"Okay, Akamaru eat this. " Naruto said as he gave Akamaru the Supreme Bean and Cheese burrito. Akamaru at it happily and in a few minutes after he had finished a small fart came out. "That's it, now go to everyone Akamaru." Naruto said as soon as he smelled the fart air he fainted. Akamaru came back and was literally bouncing in the air because his farts were so airy that he practically flew off the ground. Everyone smelled the air and as soon as they did. 3…2…1…BOOM, they had all fainted. "Oh, Akamaru…" Kiba said just before he had fainted. Poor Akamaru he stayed farting for at least another 1 hour non stop. He was a little happy that he was now a flying/bouncing dog.

**1 Hour Later.**

Everyone started waking up. Sakura was under Sasuke when she woke up; she blushed so red that it was brighter than a cherry. "Sasuke-kun, please wake up. This is kind of uncomfortable." Sakura said as she tried to look away from the sleeping Sasuke's face. Sasuke grumbled after hearing it and woke up 3 minutes after Sakura had said that to him. He groggily awakened to a Sakura 3 cm. next to his face. She stared into his eyes with blush all over as did he. Naruto had already awoken before Sasuke and Sakura. "Hey, Sasuke are you having fun with Sakura already?" Naruto said with a smirk. Sasuke blushed very hard after he heard that, but soon recovered with this. "Hey Naruto, at least I know I can get my fun unlike you." Sasuke said with a smirk. Sakura blushed heavily after hearing Sasuke. Naruto stood there looking away having no comeback of his own. "Ouch, what a burn; you want some ice Naruto?" Ino said laughing. "Ino that wasn't very nice!" Hinata said defensively.

'_They haven't noticed yet, oh Geez, they haven't noticed yet_.' Kiba thought as he stood up. As soon as Shikamaru finally awakened he put his hands on his nose and started breathing heavily. "WHAT IN KAMI-SAMA'S NAME IS THAT SMELL?! IT'S DIGUSTING! I JUST MIGHT PUKE!" Shikamaru screeched and soon after he puked just as he had said. '_And it's Shikamaru of all people to notice. Here goes._' Kiba thought with a sigh. The moment Kiba had thought that everyone sniffed the air and soon covered their noses. Even our Naruto was staring at the poor pooped out pup on the floor next to the tree seeming like he just finished a huge mission while he had just had the biggest farting frenzy in the world.

As soon as they diverted their eyes away from poor Akamaru the crowd just went straight to Naruto of course. Naruto was wearing an oxygen mask and was ready to run as well as Kiba. With this, the gang covered their faces with their hands and started chasing after no one other than Uzumaki Naruto and Inuzuka Kiba who were running from their current situation as fast as their shinobi feet could take them. "NARUTO, KIBA!! COME BACK HERE!!" screamed their friends who were chasing Naruto and Kiba with their hands on their noses. "NEVER!!" said the two crazy high school students with masks on their faces. '_Oh, Akamaru I'm sorry. Baka Naruto._' Kiba had thought while running for his life.

Well, as for little Akamaru. He got to stay and eat the left over food from their so called picnic; which had left him to be a happy little puppy once more, that little farting machine. Also Shino is still on the floor unaffected still. Did I forget to mention that Chouji was learning how to make burritos? Which means for some taste testers, and little Akamaru will be happy to do this once more. This means another Operation…

**OPERATION: STINKY FARTS PART 2 **

Just kidding!! Kiba would never let this happen again. OR WOULD HE?

Nope.

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Thanks for reading everyone! My dry humor time. I did this after eating some Fish Tacos. so yeah no squel just **YET.**

**PLEASE R&R!!**


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